Tuesday, March 9, 2010

The Old Man and The Sea Essay Rough Draft

Determination can lead a person to doing great things. Being determined can make you decide to do something great that you would have never done before in order to reach your goals. However, being overly determined can make you fail to achieve your goal. A person has to recognize the limits on what they can do before they attempt to do something. Santiago's extreme determination to reach his objective of catching the fish leads to his downfall. He did not know the limits to which he could reach. He pushed those limits too far. If he had done a few things differently, he might have been more successful.

Santiago refuses to take a rest during the whole time he is pursuing this huge fish. He becomes sloppy in his ways of trying to catch the fish. "I could just drift, he thought, and sleep and put a bight of line around my toe to wake me. But today is eighty-five days and I should fish the day well" (41). I think the fact that he has not caught a fish for so long has made the old man very determined. He feels that this is his moment to become a legend and save his career. However, while striving for these goals, he forgets that he needs rest and other things to keep himself sharp and well-aware of what he needs to do.

The fisherman's refusal to get help on this fishing trip also contributes to his downfall. He tells the boy, "You ought to go to bed now so that you will be fresh in the morning. I will take the things back to the Terrace" (23). Manolin is sypathetic to the fisherman's plight and is doing all he can to help Santiago be successful on his fishing trip, but Santiago does not want to take him with him. Manolin is not acting childish and there is no reason why Santiago should not be welcoming him to help. However later on during the trip, he wishes he had the boy there to help him. He did not plan out his trip well enough.

Santiago would have been more successful if he had realized that he has grown old and is more limited in his abilities then he was at a younger age. "It was too good to last, he thought. I wish it had been a dream now and that I had never hooked this fish and was alone in bed on the newspaper" (103). He has realized that he has reached his limits. He is now melancholy because he realizes that there is no way he will be able to get this entire fish back to shore completely intact and that his future might be bleak.

"You work now fish. I'll take you at your turn" (89). The fisherman is completely exhausted at this time. He has not slept since he went to sea and he has no one with him to watch the fish while he rests. The pursuit of this enormous fish has been long and has taken its toll on the old man. Santiago is no longer overly urgent in pursuing the fish anymore and is just waiting for it, sitting on the serene sea waiting for the moment.

Santiago mainly fails in bringing the fish because he refuses to recognize that he has limits. He does not seem to realize that he is an older man and cannot do all of the things that he used to be able to do. He refuses Manolin's help and with all of his determination, becomes blind to the fact that he needs to rest to be at his full potential. If he had been more thoughtful and less self-involved he might have achieved success.

7 comments:

  1. 1. The thesis of this essay is that the choices the old man made led to him being unsuccessful. The introduction explains it well but it could be a little more specific in examples.
    2. The quotation about the old man refusing sleep is the best and stands out the most. It's well incorporated and flows well with the paragraph. It's explained well too.
    3. The word choices in this essay are very good. They accurately and clearly explain the essay and get the point across. I like the part "The pursuit of this enormous fish has been long and has taken its toll on the old mam."
    4. One thing that the author could change is making the introduction more "Generally specific." Speck could add in a choice that someone might make in their lives that has an impact on something else. Otherwise it was good, except for a few changes in tense like the old man is doing something and he did something. Good essay! (4 body paragraphs? over achieverrrr)

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  2. 1. This essay's thesis is about the important decisions that people have to make in life. The essay is fairly clear, and does have a single focused subject. It engages the reader well after the first paragraph, which isn't too interesting.
    2. "You ought to go to bed now so that you will be fresh in the morning. I will take the things back to the Terrace" (23). this one was very good because it showed exactly the example it was used for. It stood out from the others because it was more direct than the others.
    3. I think that the essay's best quality is that it is direct and to the point. Vocabulary is used well and the essay is very well written: "The fisherman's refusal to get help on this fishing trip also contributes to his downfall." That was a very well-written sentence that really gripped the readers attention.
    4. I think that the essay's weakest quality is the opening paragraph. I believe that the writer could have made it much more interesting and gripping to make the reader want to continue reading. The word choice could also be a little bit better. Other than that, it is very well written.

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  3. 1. the thesis in this is unclear to me. it doesn't really state what it is so i am very confused with it.
    2.my favorite quote that i read was in the third example. To me it was the only one that went with the example that was used. it was the only thing that made sense cause i didn't really get the thesis.
    3.One thing i think the essay does well is word choice and organization. it was very well organized i could understand everything being said other than the thesis.
    4. The weakest part of this essay is the whole thing.JK. the weakest part is probably the thesis. it was very confusing to understand i didn't get what it was so i would make it more understandable.

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  4. 1."A person has to recognize the limits on what they can do before they attempt to do something." I believe the thesis statement is very clear. He states it in this statement. Know your limits or it will lead to your downfall.
    2.The first argument is by far the best. the quote completely goes with the argument and he seems the most passionate about it.
    3. "Determination can lead a person to doing great things." Everything that he writes is so clear, I was not confused once during the essay.
    4. His arguments could have a little more explanation and heart in them but overall it is very auspicious.

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  5. 1. The thesis is Determination can lead a person to doing great things. This is a strong thesis that shows the person's true opinions.
    2. "I could just drift, he thought, and sleep and put a bight of line around my toe to wake me. But today is eighty-five days and I should fish the day well" I think this quotation shows how the old man wished he could sleep, but determination led him to perservere.
    3. The author uses great details and explanations for his reasoning. This essay is very good at using evidence from the book.
    4. I think this essay could connect a little more to thesis, for clarification of the point you're trying to make. It is a very good essay, and it kept me reading.

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  6. The essay's thesis is that you have to realize your limits or else your determination will be your downfall. It engages me because it makes sense since Santiago is so determined to pull in this fish.

    "It was too good to last, he thought. I wish it had been a dream now and that I had never hooked this fish and was alone in bed on the newspaper" (103). This quote stood out the most because it shows that he regrets following this fish so long because of the hard work it took.

    The best part of the essay was the conclusion because it summarized the thesis and the reasoning behind it very well. "He refuses Manolin's help and with all of his determination, becomes blind to the fact that he needs to rest to be at his full potential."

    I think that the author should check for conventional error or just words that could be replaced with more descriptive alternatives.

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  7. I'm pretty sure that this is completely wrong because he did catch the fish. His bout was not big enough to haul the fish up so the best he could do is tie it to the side of the boat. It wasn't Santiago's fault it was those damn sharks.

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